Sometimes, if I’m driving and I have a random thought that I want to add to my blog, I’ll work on writing a note in my phone for stoplights upon stoplights in a row. Then, of course, I forget about the note. Shoutout to the one I wrote this past Tuesday: 

Perks of driving an old car: Never having to be afraid of getting pulled over for going over the speed limit. ….cause the speed limit is pretty much the limit of how fast your car can even go. On a good day. 

Luis “The Cannibal” Suarez

Okay I’m gonna be stuck on that Uruguay-Italy game for a WHILE. Remember that one time Suarez bit someone? Oh. I’m sorry. My b. THREE SOMEONES?! Bit them. …like with his teeth! Whaaaaaat the—-Anyone else with me on this? My head is reeling. BIT THEM. 

Guess that’s why mid-game the commentator said the behavior on the bench was “less-than-savory” …..because we all know it was PUH-rit-teeee savory on the field. Am I right or am I right?